Overwhelming-ness

Earlier this week I was overwhelmed.  Overwhelmed with the ever-growing pile of laundry that I had forgotten to start.  Overwhelmed with the mountain of dishes piled in the sink.  Overwhelmed at the dust slowly making its home on the furniture.  Overwhelmed by an enormous amount of homework.  Overwhelmed that in all of the "stuff" I needed to be doing, I also needed to get my booty to the gym.  I felt so overwhelmed that I woke up after only an hour of sleep and never went back to sleep...

In the wee hours of the morning, I prayed for peace in myself.  As I was praying, I heard "It Is Well" play through my heart.  In that instant, I knew I was ok.  In that moment, I knew He was there.  Throughout the struggle of staying awake on Tuesday, I decided that I needed to take a mental health night.  (He he...how funny is it that the psych major says that?)  Instead of going home at 4:30, walking past the laundry, the dishes, the dust, and settling at the table for a long night of studying, I left Pratt.  I went to Haven for PHS basketball.  I got to see a friend from high school who is the band director there.  I got to watch my husband coach.  I got to chat with people.  I didn't just sit and stare at a book and take notes (yes, even I, the note-taking freak, need a break once in a while).  It was a much-needed break in the routine that will undoubtedly plague me over the next two years.

Last night...last night, the overwhelmed feeling came back, this time bringing nerves right along with it.  I leave today for my first on-campus weekend.  I will be practicing my counseling skills, which I am looking forward to, but the nerves...oh, the nerves.  Brandon and I were sitting at dinner talking about our days and BOTH of my legs were bouncing.  I'm more nervous than I want to admit about this on-campus stuff.  What if I'm not good enough to be a counselor?  What will I do if I'm not good enough?  (Sound familiar? Yep, I say that a lot about many facets of myself.) Now, there are times when my nerves hit that I immediately go to worship, but a little fact about me - I actually put on rock music a lot more when nerves hit because it distracts me from the butterflies creeping in.  I Prevail, Breaking Benjamin, and Nickelback were playing in my ears last night as I finished reading about the Adlerian theory and took my test (10/10, by the way).

As I was formulating a response to a good friend who is struggling with her own overwhelming-ness (yep, I just said that...and, no, it isn't an actual word), I was trying to find something to make us all smile.  Something that would hold us in a little different way this morning.  That is when I stumbled upon Kermit.  I've seen this meme with other various statements, but how fitting this was when I needed it.  I needed the reminder this morning that I am nervous and Satan is going to try to use those nerves, but God is so much bigger than my nerves and has already defeated Satan.  In these overwhelming times, I need this reminder more and more.  In these overwhelming times, it can seem like I'm fighting the battle alone, but God is always...ALWAYS...in my corner.  And He is ALWAYS in yours.